Comment Wall


Image: "Starry Night" by Emmanuel Valtierra


Comments

  1. Hi Jose! First off your website is so visually appealing! I absolutely love the picture you used and how large you made it. It is filled with detail and color. Everything on the site is simple and complements the picture nicely. Besides that, a huge wow moment for me was the history included in your introduction. I think including that is a great way to lead into the stories you have planned with Huitzilli. What if you included a link to a video of the history in your introduction or some of your sources? I think you did a great job introducing the history, but it may aid visually and add to the setting! Huitzilli faces a huge challenge between his desires and the expectations placed on him. You mentioned that his family believes he should be a warrior, but I wonder what he actually wants to be. Maybe a farmer or healer?

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  2. Hi Jose! I really love the layout of your storybook website. I think that the banner image that you used it beautiful and goes along perfectly with the theme of your stories. Your introduction did a nice job of giving a concise overview of what kind of stories you will be telling in your book. I also appreciated the historical background that you provided at the beginning of the introduction.

    I wonder if you would be able to offer a more specific idea of the three stories that you are going to write. Are all of the stories going to focus Huitzilli becoming a warrior? You might also consider adding a little bit more background information about Huitzilli to set them up as the main character of your storybook. This could help the readers know what to expect and also make them more interested in what is to come. Great start on your storybook!

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  3. Hi Jose!
    I really love the design of your site. The artwork is fantastic, and the historical background really gives a great framework for the story. It looks like the story you are building to will be a great coming of age story! I can't wait to find out how he handles his predicament. I wonder what would happen if you tried to write more from his perspective. To really get into his head to talk about his upcoming emotional struggle.
    Can't wait to keep reading!

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  4. Hey there Jose! Like many people have already said, your site is one of the most aesthetically pleasing project that I have ever seen, and I was in Prof. Gibbs' class previously! As for your text, the introduction page was extremely informative. You included a ton of background information on this page, and as someone who had no previous knowledge on this topic I really appreciated that. For your "Beginning" story, I thought that you organized it in such a way that was extremely easy to read and navigate. Also, you added an abundance of images that really helped your project reach the next level of website development. The only thing that I would suggest is to take out some of the perfectionism of the site, and add some emotional insight on your main character in order for a deeper connection to be made with the reader. Overall, you have done a great job so far and I look forward to reading more in the future.

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  5. Hi Jose! I really enjoyed visiting your site and reading your story! I love the simplicity and color scheme of your layout and I love all of the images you chose to include. I honestly feel like they helped me to connect to your story. Also, I can tell that you put a lot of thought and hard work into the creation of this story. It is evident that you did your research and have the knowledge and insight to bring your story to life. The inclusion of Aztec history throughout the story, although a bit difficult to follow at first, was a really nice touch. Presenting the background information at the same time that you are telling the story is a good way to really help your readers understand the context in a more thorough and factual way. As for your story, I thought it was really interesting. Like I mentioned earlier, it was a little difficult to follow at first with the two dialogues running at the same time, but after rereading it I understood and really liked it! I can't wait to hear more from you! Great job!

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  6. Hey Jose!

    Your storybook is so cool. I'm a huge fan of learning history, so I really appreciated your introduction. It helped me learn a bit about the Aztecs, which made your first story more enjoyable to read. As far as the story itself, setting the two tales side by side was a great touch. Have you considered moving your author's note to the beginning? Once I figured out the structure, I enjoyed it a lot; it was like a movie! However, the clarification of what was going on could have been given at the top of the page. I enjoyed your descriptions during Huitzilli's story. Meeting Quetzalcoatl and not being punished was a great twist! I can also tell you put a lot of thought into how you wrote the creation account. Have you considered using this dual-story structure in your next two project stories? I think your storybook is off to a great start, best of luck finishing it all up!

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  7. Hi Jose!

    I liked how you named the son "Huitzilli," which is similar to "Huitzilopochtli." It puts the parents into a perspective that when Huitzilli was born, they wanted him to be like the war god and bring honor to the family. I could tell that Huitzilli's name must have been a central symbol of the role he was supposed to play.

    I would place information about the font changes before the actual story, so people don't need to scroll down and up before understanding how to read your story.

    In your origin story, after the first Sun came to an end, the people stopped worshipping the gods appropriately. Quetzalcoatl loved the people as they were, but Tezcatlipoca became angry and turned them into monkeys.

    Did Quetzalcoatl disapprove of the Flowery Wars and so sympathized with Huitzulli? I am very curious about where your story will go, though it takes get getting eased to reading one font of paragraphs before I read the other font. Could Quetzalcoatl tell Huitzilli the origin story so the two stories can be combined? Or perhaps Quetzalcoatl could observe Huitzulli and have a flashback to the original story? I know in your author's note you mentioned that later with more content, we would understand, so perhaps I am short-sided when I make these suggestions.

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  8. Wow, what a creative way to go about telling the story. I think that telling the stories side by side is a brilliant idea, and I do appreciate how you distinguished them by making one bold and the other not. It did take me a little bit of time to figure out what was going on, but I eventually got it. I would suggest adding a bit about how you are telling your story in this manner in the intro, I think it would cause a little less confusion at the beginning. It is really cool though and it teaches us something all while we get to read a story as well. I found the flower wars to be really interesting. I think it is cool that they had an agreement to not use long range weapons. I wonder why it is called the flower war. Oh, I really like how you had footnotes in the authors note explaining all of the things that we may not know, thank you for that.

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  9. Hi, Jose! It’s nice to meet you! First of all, I love the images you’ve chosen for your storybook project. Emmanuel Valtierra is an amazing artist, and I’m happy to see him getting some recognition throughout your work. I think you have the website aesthetic nailed down, so I’ll move shift my focus to the writing. Let’s start with your first story.

    I’m so excited to read a project based on Aztec mythology and folklore! I’ve done some research on Quetzalcoatl and the four gods hailing from different lands. I didn’t know much about Huitzilopochtli before reading your story, so this has been an interesting learning experience. I like the idea of a god who doesn’t care much for his role as the bringer of war, and I was able to empathize with Huitzilli throughout his trials.

    Overall, I enjoy your writing and look forward to reading the rest of your storybook! Keep up the good work.

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  10. Hi Jose,
    I really enjoyed exploring your storybook today. This is the first storybook that i have found that focuses on the Aztecs which I found interesting. I felt the introduction was informative and gave me good information on the Aztec culture. I think that it is unique and helpful that you implemented the two side by side story telling. If I were to add anything, I would suggest adding to the introduction to perhaps elaborate more on Huitzilli so that we know more about him in the beginning. I also think mentioning your story style in the beginning of the introduction would be helpful for the reader. Perhaps giving an example of this in the introduction could aid the reader prior to reading the first story. I think this is needed because it was somewhat confusing having to jump from one story to the next. Nevertheless, the stories are quite interesting and I enjoy the multiple images you include in the story. Great storybook!

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  11. Hi Jose,
    I loved reading through your storybook! I had some previous knowledge about the Aztecs and the gods and goddesses they worshiped but I'm glad I got to learn so much more. I like that you decided to blend the creation story with the actual main story. At first, it was a little confusing, but I got used to it pretty quick and it helped a lot that you split them up into separate paragraphs. The images you are using on the website are also well placed and add to the story rather than taking away from it. The layout of the website is very good as well, from the banner images to the different links! Keep up the good work and I'm looking forward to reading the rest of your storybook if you make any new additions to your story. You left the last one I read off on a cliff hanger and I'm excited to see what happens next in the storyline.

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  12. Hello Jose,
    First off I would just like to say wow, your storybook looks so great! This is by far the most visually appealing storybook I have seen so far You can really see how dedicated to making the reader feel like they are a part of this story. The visual aspect of this storybook almost brings as much to the table as the actual content does. You've done a great job with making sure every aspect of this story is top notch.

    Now onto the story you've written, which is a great rendition of some of the traditions and cultures of the Aztecs. Initially I was a little confused with your story layout which led me to confusion within the story. I think one storytelling tool you could use to correct this confusion is an introduction page. In this page you could explain in a summarized way what your story will contain so readers can have an idea going into the story. Overall, great job!

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  13. Hey Jose,

    First off, your storybook webpage was easy to navigate! The images you used throughout your project for you banner and story were vibrant, which help grabs the reader's attention. I didn't have previous knowledge about the Aztecs and the gods/goddesses they worshipped. But I learned so much through reading your stories. Your creation stories are highly thorough; you did a great job with breaking up the paragraphs and bolding some sections to better convey your representation of the Aztecs. Another thing I want to compliment you on is your detailed analysis in the author's note. I know one of the things Prof. Gibbs asked us to work on is being more meticulous in the author's note portion of our projects. Honestly, I don't think you need any suggestions towards your storybook. It is very well put together! I look forward to seeing the finalized webpage at the end of the semester.

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  14. Hi Jose! In your introduction, I appreciated that you included a pronunciation for Huitzilopochtli. Maybe you can do this for some of the other words like Tlacaelel. It is interesting how you told the stories side by side. I will say that it was a little confusing at first having to keep two stories going in my mind at the same time. Maybe you could give your readers advice on how to read the stories. Should they read them at the same time or read the unbolded before the bolded? I found myself reading the mythology of the story first and then your bolded text. I like the pictures you have of the Gods, but you might want to consider enlarging them. More people would be able to appreciate the detail in the art works if they were bigger. Good luck with the rest of the semester! Your storybook idea is very unique!

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  15. Hi Jose!

    I think the idea of your storybook is really cool, and I'm glad you decided to run with it. The potential these stories have are practically endless, because the culture you're writing about is so diverse and abundant. I love it. I also found the bolded and unbolded a little confusing, and I think a quick run through of how to read your stories (maybe in your intro) would be a great idea. I think the pictures you included are really amazing, they have a lot of color and are beautiful. Good luck with your stories and the rest of the semester.

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